A quick update.

I have made it past the first month at my job.  It hasn't been an easy time but I feel I am learning to cope with stress. I have followed Mario's advice and guidelines about prioritizing and keeping everything in perspective, remembering that I am just human and have limits. Most importantly, I have learned that there is some work that simply won't get done today, this week or even maybe this month, and that is OK.

Once again, Mario has been by my side during these difficult, adjusting weeks.  Not only has he been patient, but has also given me very valuable advice and helped me with a very time-consuming project. Looking forward, I would like to continue learning about the business but, more importantly, about becoming a more well-rounded person.

And tomorrow is Valentine's Day, a celebration I used to daydream about when I was younger.  However, Valentine's Day is not a date I particularly celebrate anymore ....because life with Mario is filled with Valentine's days.

Countdown 'til Christmas

Mario and I are just a few hours away from officially starting our Christmas holidays!  When he gets off work this evening, we will pack our bags with clothes, gifts and joy.  This year's celebrations are certainly going to be special, for many reasons. In addition to my new job opportunity,  both Mario and I are going to have time off to  travel, shop, plan, cook and enjoy the season together!

In the past, something always came up and either he or I had to work.  We always managed to get everything done, but it wasn't the same.  This year we want to take in our blessings, which are many, and do so together.

News.

A new ray of hope arrived last Thursday in the form of yet another interview, this time via phone.  And so I was prepared to wait for several more days to get a final word on the status of my candidacy.  This time, however, I underestimated the quickness of the decision process:  the final call took place on Friday afternoon.

It caught me by surprise, walking home, thinking about the long weekend about to start and some repairs needed to be taken care of at home.  When I heard the news, my lungs filled with joy and excitement, my eyes with tears.

Seeing the smile in my husband's face was the best reward I could have asked for.  We have had a five-day weekend to celebrate, make plans, enjoy the weight off our shoulders......and the best is yet to come.

The call that never came

I have been waiting for that important call for two weeks now.  It hasn't happened, and so today I will be making the call.  I feel I already know the answer that I am going to receive, which is not going to be positive for me.  But this is one of those situations in which, even though I know I am not going to like the news, I need to personally hear them in order to put some closure to this process.

My initial excitement turned into fear of having done a poor job, then into anxiety and finally into hopelessness.  And so today I will listen to the outcome and move on, bruised and hurt, but still standing.....because despite the bleak forecast for the years ahead, the show must go on.

Always a reason for giving thanks on Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving Day is celebrated tomorrow in the United States, amidst feasts of turkey, gravy and pumpkin pie.  I won't be replicating the festivities here, but certainly feel I have lots to be thankful for.  And I am not going to lie, I am hoping I have one particular reason to add to the list.   Those who are close to me know what that "particular reason" is.  And so I keep on waiting for the phone call that could deliver the news, which could be positive or negative.

In any case, and no matter what news that phone call delivers, I still plan to give thanks for everything in my life that makes me feel truly fortunate and blessed.

Celebrating (or not) Halloween

Halloween is ten days away, but it will go relatively unnoticed just like Valentine's Day or Easter.  There won't be orange candy at the store, or lit-up pumpkins by windows, or kids knocking on doors wearing scary outfits and screaming "trick or treat" threats.  And I will miss all of it.

I like the changing of seasons and those little celebrations are a fun reminder that time comes and goes, and that we should cherish those passing moments.  So I still have time to come up with my own plan for this Halloween and maybe I will go to an amusement park, or carve a pumpkin, or watch one of those scary movies that I always avoid.

More on the crisis

So, new economic figures came out yesterday and, as no surprise, they continued a devastating trend.  In summary, those without a job currently top 4 million and the unemployment rate is above 20% again.

Despite too many months of  too many negative news, I have not become inmune to the severity of these numbers and the real drama they hide behind.  I used to read about the precariousness of the Spanish labor market and browsed through numerous stories of people unable to find jobs, forced to migrate or work in barely-legal conditions.  They all felt distant, until now that I am one in those 4 million.

I am frustrated, very frustrated.  I don´t feel better than anyone else, but my resume is not ordinary either.  I am bilingual, have several degrees, have lived abroad, worked over 10 years; I have done all I was supposed to do to have a job that would be fulfilling to me and meaningful to society.  But instead, I am out of work and with pretty slim perspectives of finding one anytime soon.

The price tag is a hefty one and I am fighting, everyday, to remind myself that it is not my fault, that I am a good candidate, that I am employable.  However, at this point, one of my main goals is to leave this phase with my self-esteem untouched.